I've been working on a post that summed up my absence over the summer months. A humorous self-titled* post to break the ice and get back to blogging on a regular basis. It's still not finished, almost, but not quite.
And then yesterday I got a phone call regarding two of my very best friends here in Nashville. Leaving out all details, basically my heart, pride, and trust have been crushed. So this little emotional word-salad gushed out yesterday while I waited in line to pick up my eldest from school. Here it is in all its unedited glory.
"Words won't come. How can you organize a single coherent thought while betrayal churns, fresh and putrid, in your gut.
I can't judge the acts. I am no saint, to be sure. The lies will not abide. To trust and defend were my downfall. I will not blindly do either again.
Guilt, I hope, has entered their minds. It will be a self-inflicted punishment. If they have no guilt, then nothing is left of their souls."
Weird, I know. But if felt good to get it out. And it was better than puking which is the other feeling I had.
Hopefully today is a better day and I get some real writing done.
*Self-Titled, as in "A Day in the Life of Me"
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3 comments:
Oh, Aven! It's times like this that really tries us and makes us grow up, unfortunately. It happens to us all. Hang in there, lady.
Gosh Aven, hope things are better now. Belated *hugs*
Yes, things are better in that area. Thanks for the Hugs *s*
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